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![When I came back after taking a quick break from doing yard work, I saw my bro zipping up his pants and my mommy [Amanda Cerny] looking at her measuring tape like this. I wonder what they just measured?](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/sTcWaV9wJwdFK-g6T0Hp6EKhWgPbkrU-VVo4V5PqwIg.jpg)
![When I came back after taking a quick break from doing yard work, I saw my bro zipping up his pants and my mommy [Amanda Cerny] looking at her measuring tape like this. I wonder what they just measured?](https://i.redd.it/oj3fumwj5xkb1.jpg)
![My girlfriend [Jenna Ortega] and I are about to fall victim to Ghostface as he has us cornered defenseless. Right before he finishes us off, Jenna says she’ll do “anything he wants” to spare us…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/Tg3EfvcNWUhPiFnjFh4rNBdGXZz7N4nQfxNru8P3jRw.jpg)
![My girlfriend [Jenna Ortega] and I are about to fall victim to Ghostface as he has us cornered defenseless. Right before he finishes us off, Jenna says she’ll do “anything he wants” to spare us…](https://i.redd.it/8ie2795l01ib1.jpg)
![I went to the bathroom during a concert only to come back and find my girlfriend [Jenna Ortega] on the ground like this as some random guy walked away zipping his pants up…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/jJJg7-fF-t1ccr5wqFSSwUfBn-RShgzP9FrwRtqgsCI.jpg)
![I went to the bathroom during a concert only to come back and find my girlfriend [Jenna Ortega] on the ground like this as some random guy walked away zipping his pants up…](https://i.redd.it/kgjjx0sh29yb1.jpg)
![I walked in on my bully adjusting his pants and my gf [Billie Eilish] getting up from her knees. As I casually went to greet her with a kiss she did this on my face…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/WG-cmDkDIGL0jJZzwYqVoWstgZaBG25mayRdytqlg_Q.jpg)
![I walked in on my bully adjusting his pants and my gf [Billie Eilish] getting up from her knees. As I casually went to greet her with a kiss she did this on my face…](https://i.redd.it/pfm3nwg0v9mb1.gif)
![This is the outfit my girlfriend [Sommer Ray] is wearing to the party she said I wasn’t “big enough” to go to...](https://a.thumbs.redditmedia.com/6Zraq0dEQFQUbhgkRvjns-PPh4-RTWb_j9PR7omS3z8.jpg)
![This is the outfit my girlfriend [Sommer Ray] is wearing to the party she said I wasn’t “big enough” to go to...](https://i.redd.it/vh922eqn4oxb1.jpg)
![My gf [Sommer Ray] told me she was going to the beach but I couldn’t come because it was “Black Only”. I didn’t understand what that meant, so I secretly followed her only to spot her tanning in a completely different outfit and with a completely different bag than when she left…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/ag9YE8be9slcyJGo4_M9UHCJIXE2-9ZIY5akKVVyJFI.jpg)
![My gf [Sommer Ray] told me she was going to the beach but I couldn’t come because it was “Black Only”. I didn’t understand what that meant, so I secretly followed her only to spot her tanning in a completely different outfit and with a completely different bag than when she left…](https://preview.redd.it/czm9gmoa6wmb1.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd579ca951e34b48bad0901552a5cfaac4687ee3)
![Whenever my friend comes over and my gf [Pokimane] gets bored of hearing me talk, she starts to make suggestive gestures towards him like this…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/FpSiQRAMMa5IBmm-l0-2n6Pjp-YlTduSPVuPbu5ftJc.jpg)
![Whenever my friend comes over and my gf [Pokimane] gets bored of hearing me talk, she starts to make suggestive gestures towards him like this…](https://i.redd.it/95w2sevdbhmb1.gif)
![My girlfriend [Billie Eilish] finally agreed to go out in public with me but made sure to put on a hoodie because she “doesn’t want to be seen with a white boy”](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/-uKGnacYORDV_ZWY6aKDkh__yzC4DQIv2bzKhqzPqzQ.jpg)
![My girlfriend [Billie Eilish] finally agreed to go out in public with me but made sure to put on a hoodie because she “doesn’t want to be seen with a white boy”](https://i.redd.it/uqn8by1ypgab1.jpg)
![I owe some dangerous people a lot of money that I don’t have; so they decided that the mouth of my mommy [Scarlett Johansson] is good enough to hold them off until I can somehow get enough to pay my debt…](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/9qrz8WPYMiJ7i1Xhhta2xLtk4EZPyuPR9tHCefhAWwc.jpg)
![I owe some dangerous people a lot of money that I don’t have; so they decided that the mouth of my mommy [Scarlett Johansson] is good enough to hold them off until I can somehow get enough to pay my debt…](https://i.redd.it/6y6y3ceoymnb1.gif)